Me, Being Mummy: Week 48: Cbeebies

Cbeebies has become a part of life. Gone are the mornings off, watching Jeremy Kyle or Come Dine with Me marathons of a weekend. Now, I have Mr Tumble and The Octanauts instead. I don’t mind of course. These characters fascinate BB which means that they keep him company whilst I run around like a deranged rabbit, tidying house and catching up on some work. But I do find myself watching things too as I go about my business, and I have some observations and also burning questions that have cropped up since becoming a regular viewer. Let me divulge:
Disclaimer: All following observations are made in jest… I know we can all get quite protective of our little Cbeebies characters from time to time so no hate mail please!
1) Mr Tumble aka Justin Fletcher is a bit like superman. Firstly, he has about a gazillion characters he portrays in multiple programmes and never does he tire out! On camera at least, I’m sure he’s prostrate in his dressing room with a beer as we speak. He also has the most thinly veiled costumes/disguises and I genuinely don’t think that children figure it out that all the characters are just one person… a bit like when Superman just wears less spandex and glasses when he becomes Clark Kent. Plus, Justin knows sign language! So impressive. I’ve been known to practice signing once or twice/every time it’s been on. I’m now fluent in the words ‘thank you’, ‘friends’ and ‘hamster’.
2) Bing Bunny is rather cute but killed a butterfly which made for awkward viewing although I try not to hold prejudice because it was an accident that Flopp couldn’t fix. Incidentally, Flopp is his sidekick/carer/possible parent who guides Bing Bunny through life’s dramas (including killing insects) and looks like a cross between a squirrel and a doorstop. If he is Bing Bunny’s Dad then I am intrigued to see what Bing’s mother looks like and if she’s hiding a secret. Who are Bing’s parents?! Watch it, the size difference is eyebrow raising.
Note: A friend of mine recently pointed out that Bing wears dungarees all the time and we both agreed that must be a nightmare for potty training.
3) Sarah and Duck – possibly the most boring intro and outro credits known to man.
4) Rebecca from Let’s Play is every Dad’s Cbeebies eye candy. And also a talented actress as she nails all types of accents on the show!
5) Speaking of eye candy, for us Mums, it’s slim pickings really. It’s a toss up between Mr Bloom or Andy from Andy ‘s prehistoric adventures. On a good day they both look attractive. If I squint.
6) Andy’s Prehistoric Adventures throws up lost of questions. Such as ‘Why is the natural history museum never rammed?’ Why are there only at max 4 staff?’ ‘How can Andy piss about with lots of dangerous flesh eating dinosaurs and NEVER get nibbled on?’ and ‘If there was a massive time travelling clock in the middle of the museum, how did Andy find it and noone else even notice??’.
7) Grandpa in My Pocket is about a Grandpa who has a hat that shrinks him down to the size of a borrower and he can bring toy travel to life through flying toy aeroplanes and driving cars. Where did he get this hat?? Why doesn’t he fly off to warmer, sunnier climates? Plus he can run around at top speed whilst tiny but full size he’s aged and, according to his naive daughter/daughter in law, takes a lot of naps?? Sneaky Grandpa.
8) I Can Cook is like watching an accident waiting to happen. Kids with scissors… eek!
9) Waybaloo is great for learning yoga! Watching kids react to CGI is also hilariously naff. 
10) Peter Rabbit and Friends would make Beatrix Potter rather proud of herself for still entertaining the younger generations over a century on from her first publication. The show brought a tear to my eye the other day after it touched upon the death of Peter Rabbit’s father who was put in a pie, and his family watched an old movie reel with him scampering about all happy and carefree before his demise.. Heavy stuff for 4yrs and under…. and almost 30yrs+ so it seems. Pass me a tissue *sniff*
11) Melody is about a girl who listens to music and uses it to create a story. Reminds me of a Cbeebie’s version of Fantasia. Is her mum really her mum though? 
12) Tree Fu Tom has a friend called Areola. Nuff said. 
13) Topsy and Tim are not related or under 5 years old. They are nearing double digits and the whole family make my toes curl. From Topsy’s annoying hair do, to Tim’s over enthusiasm at EVERYTHING, whilst their smug Mum handles every situation (including work AND moving house!) with a sweet high octave voice and their Dad comes across as perfect when he is most probably shagging his secretary or running up high bills on phone chat lines or something. They ruin all the love I had for the books as a child, hence my irrational animosity!
14) The Twirlywoos are just pure genius. Mostly because they render BB mute and immobile for 10 minutes. But also because they are cute, funny and I actually have no idea what they are. Turkeys? Chickens? Long lost, far distant cousins of Pingu?? I dunno, but I love ’em!
15) In the Night Garden petrifies both myself and BB. The Ninky Nonk in particular seems to trigger our fear… along with the weird ‘singing’ from the Toucan. All the characters look high (mostly like the creators of the show) and Upsy Daisy has a really unhealthy habit of flashing her knickers at any given opportunity! And Iggle Piggle needs the 3 day Nanny as he’s never in bed. 
NOTE: This show also fills me with terror as it is the last show that Cbeebies plays of an evening before the channel finishes for the day and signals bedtime/free time for all parents out there. I have been known to panic and exclaim to PB on several occasions: ‘Quick! Oh my God! The night garden is on and he hasn’t even had dinner yet?! Shit, shit shit. SHIT!’.

Additional observations and findings from this week:

– Myself and my sister took a jaunt to The Bluebell Walk in Arlington the other day. It was raining and muddy plus I ran late due to BB wetting himself through twice and the petrol light decided to come on just as we were leaving, but hey, we made it through full of optimism and relief at being out in the fresh air! I will never wear converse trainers out on a walk in the mud again though. Wellies shall be purchased! My sister bravely saved myself and BB from sliding down the muddy bank into the neighbouring ponds and rivers several times and of course, BB ate wotsits, drank his milk and slept through all the dramas, screams and giggle fits. My nephew recreated the scene from the Vicar of Dibley by jumping in a puddle that came up to his waist and lost his wellington boot (which was subsequently rescued again by my superwoman Sister) and my niece chattered away the whole time and tried to show me her newly acquired bottle of bubbles whilst I was grappling with my buggy and doing the splits on a particularly slippery part of a muddy slope. Even now I am laughing. It was a very funny adventure!

– City Jogger buggies are aptly named and only good for the City. On muddy walks on uneven trails and ploughed fields I would have been better off with a wheelbarrow. 

– BB crawled properly for the first time this week! I managed to capture it for my memories to refer back to and to show him in years to come. So chuffed!
– Congestion has been plaguing BB for the best part of 3 weeks and this past weekend found me having the Doctor visit the house at 3am. Soluble steroids have been given to help his breathing, especially at night and I am running on empty thanks to a significant lack of sleep. If this post is incoherent then accept the apologies of a very tired Mummy. 
– Wotsits are BB’s latest find. As are breadsticks. 
– Housework is so far down the priority list that I currently have no clean forks, glasses or normal bras. My sports bra crop tops are my emergency back up. I’d forgotten how comfy they are?! 

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Comments

  1. April 24, 2016 / 10:23 am

    Very funny CBeebies is so much fun allthough I completely agree with all your findings I believe melodys mum is her auntie in real life Thanks for linking to the #binkylinky

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