Me, Being Mummy: Week 2

TO SUM UP: TIME MANAGEMENT AND MISSING THINGS
Hi Guys!
This week has felt like a surreal whirlwind, with the centre of the cyclone being the ever evolving, changing and all consuming Baby Bear Teddy.
The days have simply whizzed by, which at first surprised me but upon reflection, when you spend your day (and night) dividing the time into 3 hour periods that are intricately navigated in order to allow for breastfeeding, changing nappies, changing baby grows, eating, showering, sleeping and going to the loo…. its no surprise really is it?
Someone’s a little bit drunk from booby juice… 
Not to mention we managed to make it out of the house twice this week. Twice! As in TWO times. As ludicrous as it sounds, with a 2 week old baby, all the gadgets and luggage that go with him and all carried out after receiving the same amount of sleep as a vampire suffering with insomnia, it feels like a pretty big achievement to be honest.
Our first was a trip out to the orthodontist. I used to have braces and a small permanent retainer that was left with me in my teens, behind my two front teeth, came loose on one side so I had to go and get it re glued onto the back of my tooth. Operation ‘get to the orthodontic appointment on time’ started well enough… to the point where myself and Paulibear were smugly smiling at each other, both thinking that hey, this going out with a tiny baby thing is easy peasy!
Oh dear God, no….
My orthodontic appointment was due for 3.20pm. I wanted to get there for 3.10pm as had been warned I needed to fill out paperwork. The surgery was 12 minutes away, so, at 2.45pm when myself and Paulibear were about to leave the house, it was a slight hiccup to proceedings when Paulibear turned to me and said ‘errr…. nappies would probably be a good idea…’.
Cue lots of laughter as we navigated our way around the contents required for a successful changing bag. That took us til 2.55pm.
Next came putting Baby Bear, safely cocooned in his car seat, into the back of the car…. A car which is 3 door with a problematic front seat that doesn’t like to give much room to manoeuvre!
Then we realised that the nifty rear view mirror contraption we had purchased so we could see Teddy whilst sat in our front seats… was still in its packaging back in our livingroom. So, off I went to retrieve it, before spending 10 minutes trying to follow picture book instructions to secure it in place using just two flaps and a bit of velcro. That took us til 3.10pm. Cue panic.
We set off, using the sat nav for optimum traffic management (especially as by then, the multiple schools around us were spilling out their pupils and the roads were mega busy!) whilst I rang ahead to the surgery to notify them of my lateness.
The receptionist warned I may need to rebook as I was going to be at least 15 minutes more, but upon hearing the squeak of panic in my voice as I said not to worry as it was my fault, she told us to still head in as she may be able squeeze me in somewhere.
We arrived at the surgery at 3.40pm. 3.40pm!! They were still able to fit me in but I was all shakey in the reception as I filled in the forms and when it came time to pay for my treatment, I realised I had managed to forget my debit card which was still in the car! I had to run out to get it (well… more like quickly walk as I don’t exactly run, especially with vaginal stitches) and then upon running back up to the clinic and trying the big front door, I realised I had actually run up to the adjacent front door and was trying to get into someone’s private residence?? The walk of shame back round to the correct front door and my flustered admission to the amused receptionists (who had watched my every move out of the big bay windows) about being a new mum of a week and a half old baby was a bit cringey. Luckily the receptionists were sympathetic and made lots of ‘awww, bless you!’ sounds. To say I was relieved to get back in the car is an understatement.
Teddy Bear fast asleep…. lucky bug!
We congratulated ourselves with a Burger King drive thru and a pit stop to Toys r Us. Would have been a perfect treat, if it wasn’t for the 25 minutes spent trying to open up our brand new Baby Jogger pram, complete with adaptors for the car seat. To the people who were treated to the spectacle of two Bears scratching their heads, hunched over a pram waving an instruction booklet at one another in hysterical laughing fits…. I hope we brightened your day a little. Especially when one of the Bears laughed so hard that she had to sit in the boot of the car to help her post natal pelvic floor muscles refrain from giving way in public. That would have probably added to even more hilarity to proceedings though, to be honest….
What was our second trip? We went out for lunch with my Brother in Law and his girlfriend. We figured safety in numbers was a good way to go and the extra couple of pairs of hands were very helpful. We had a nice catch up over a yummy pub lunch, overlooking the Sussex Downs and Teddy was very well behaved…. as were his family. All the waitresses were cooing over how tiny he is and it was nice to be out of the house for a bit, a change of scenery was just as good as a rest. I even breast fed for the first time in public and no one came after me with a pitch fork so thats reassuring!
Teddy enjoying his new Bear Chair, courtesy of his Uncle Daniel and Auntie Iza who brought it down on their visit to the Bear Cave. 
As well as almost missing my orthodontic appointment, this week has had me missing other things… and at times, missing other people.
Upon running a bath one evening, I found myself feeling emotional because bath time was a precious time of day for me whilst I was carrying Teddy. It was my time. The time of day where I switched off from work and people and to do lists and spent an hour soaking away all my aches whilst feeling Baby Bear wriggling around in my tummy. I suddenly realised I was getting into the bath on my own and I got quite tearful. Until Paulibear pointed to the Moses Basket and said ‘He’s still here… look, he’s in there asleep’. That made me laugh and get a hold of myself. What hopes do I have of overcoming separation anxiety in the future if if can’t even get over having a bath on my own?! And on the upside, I can now get in and out of said bath without images of a crane or winch entering my head… RESULT!
But, no amount of rationale can help me stop missing the people who I wish could have been here to meet Teddy. Having a baby makes you really take note of your own mortality and also of those around you. I have been missing my Nan a lot this week, and a lot of treasured friends who were like family who would have treasured being a part of this journey. Hopefully they are still watching… and pissing themselves at the sight of myself and Paulibear learning to hit the ground running at the task of being parents. With any luck, the afterlife frequent the car park outside the Burger King and Toys r Us…. they’d have had a hoot!
Additional information and findings from this week:
– 3 hours goes very quickly.
– Sleep is possibly the most valuable commodity on this planet. It is gold dust now, and I wish I had savoured every lie in, nap, snooze and doze with vigour.
– In hindsight, reading instruction booklets and practising use of baby gadgets BEFORE leaving the safety of home is wise…. crash courses in the middle of busy car parks and in front of members of public (and possibly the afterlife) aren’t ideal.
– Putting 4 table spoonfuls of baby bubbles into 1/4 inch of Bath water results in a very slippery baby…. whom requires a lot of rinsing.
– 8 nappy changes a day makes good practice for being a nappy changing pro!
– Laundry has tripled.
– A sleeping baby is cute. A crying baby is petrifying.
Breastfeeding is intense. Am managing to keep up and Teddy is gaining weight so far, but let’s put it this way…. no one needs a support network for SMA or Cow and Gate do they?
I would like to thank whoever invented chocolate bourbons. And baby bels.

Cuddle time is my new ‘precious time of day’. 

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